Miley Madness

Miley Madness

Posted on 29. Oct, 2013 by Kimmy Sullivan in Op/Ed

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By Kimmy Sullivan, ‘15

In 2006 when we first met her, she was scampering through the halls of Seaview High with her trusty companions Lilly Truscott and Oliver Oken, going to entertaining lengths to protect her secret identity as a widely known pop-star. Seven years later, some would argue that she has gone off the deep end. Who is this character? That’s right, we’re talking about the post-Liam Hemsworth tongue-waggling queen of twerk: Miley Cyrus.

Due to her latest antics including her performance at the Video Music Awards, the video to her hit song “Wrecking Ball” and a handful of public appearances nearly in the nude, Miley has America enthralled. Here’s a brief recap: she sang, she twerked, she rubbed herself with a foam finger. And she did it all in shiny, skin-colored underwear. Long story short, the world saw a lot more Miley than it ever had before.

The release of her “Wrecking Ball” video gave Miley’s critics even more material to work with. The main points of the video included Cyrus tenderly licking a sledgehammer (let’s hope she got her tetanus booster) and swinging naked atop an actual wrecking ball. All this is artistically punctuated by startlingly close shots of Cyrus’ tear-ridden face. Despite all arguments, the video was a hit. Breaking the Vevo record previously held by One Direction, “Wrecking Ball” racked up over 15 million views in a 24 hour period. I mean, what better complements a catchy chorus and exceptional vocals than the singer’s naked body laying in a pile of rubble?

Miley also recently teamed up with Mike WiLL Made It, Wiz Khalifa, and Juicy J to record and film a video for their single, “23.” The title is in reference to Michael Jordan’s jersey number– who knew Miley was such a basketball fan! Her appearances in the video consist mostly of her walking around a high school in various raunchy outfits that vaguely resemble basketball jerseys. Perhaps the most entertaining aspect of this whole ordeal is the fact that Miley attempts to rap– and let’s just say she’s no Busta Rhymes. If Hannah Montana was still alive in there, Miley used this stunt to finally bash the metaphorical pink guitar into her blonde head.

All opinions aside, career-wise, Cyrus is a genius; the media is constantly scrambling to document her every move. People can’t wait to see what ridiculous stunt she’ll pull next, and there’s no doubt she’s stashing a few up her sleeve (or, um, wherever she stores things).

If Miley’s goal was to discard the inevitable goody two-shoes reputation brought about by her Disney Channel roots, her recent actions did so in record time. As her singsong drug references and scandalous ensembles have practically screamed, Miley’s a big girl now. But despite her obvious success, many would agree that her journey to show the world she’s all grown up has become vulgar, and honestly, a bit comical. Is the nudity really necessary? I mean I’m all for self expression, but considering the wide age range of VMA viewers, it’s probably a good idea to keep it more appropriate. Billy Ray Cyrus, Miley’s father, said in an interview, “I think she could’ve went out and [done her VMA performance] in a flannel shirt and a pair of jeans, and it would have still been just as strong.”

This, of course, begs the question: if it would’ve been just as strong in a flannel and jeans, why did she have to do it in her underwear?

One thing I think we can all agree on is that although Miley’s rise to the top has been ludicrous, it has kept us watching.

“Miley is…. evolving as an artist,” Billy Ray said in the same interview.

I don’t know what father would approve of his daughter grinding on a thirty-six-year-old man in front of millions of viewers, but at least there’s no tension in the Cyrus household.

So Miley, you just keep doing you- but please do it in a bit more clothing. Remember that the world is watching (and most of it is probably laughing). And one final piece of advice: keep your tongue in your mouth or you’ll catch flies.

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